Finding the Field
By
Jennifer Angelina Petro
It’s there.
Inside. And that
Is so easy
For me to say.
And for that, I am
Ever grateful. For you,
It may not be.
The furthest thing
May be a field
Inside you.
It might be so far
Away it may as well
Not even be there.
You might be
Full of vast ink-
Oceans and fog
That moves as if
It was alive—the darkness
Might be so all
Encompassing you
Can’t imagine
Anything else in there.
Try this though—
Close your eyes, and take
As slow, deep a breath
To the count of four as you can,
Hold it gently to
The count of four,
Then exhale slowly
To the count of four,
Do this sequence three times
And then low
A field appears
In front of you, watch—
It might be golden wheat,
It might be soft green
And full of flowers,
It might be a field
Of sunflowers stretching as far
As the eye can see.
See the golden field
Sway as the wind touches
Each strand with so much
Tenderness, see how the field
Ripples with a river of joy from the touch,
See it—the sun—raying exquisitely
Humming light—honeyed
And warm; and see
Blue sky arching over
A perfectly color-
Coordinated relationship
With the field.
Notice you are
Standing just outside
The field. Realize
The wheat, the grass, the wild flowers
Nearly all come up
To your waist–
Except the sunflowers—
See them bowing their heads
To smile upon you—
And there you are just
On the edge of the field.
You reach out your hand,
And brush the top of the grass.
Now, you can either step into the field
Or you can turn around
Back to whatever it is
That’s behind you. There
You have a choice:
Brilliant, luminous light-touched
Field, darkness that isn’t
The nourishing kind, but draining.
Whatever it is you choose,
Know this: you now have
A field inside you,
And it will always be there,
It always has been there
Swaying beneath the breath
Of the one who loves you.
The next step is not just
Up to you. I mean, it is, and also
There are forces–
Currents and hands
Pushing and pulling, guiding,
Persuading, nudging, influencing
The way. And there are the ones
Who, for whatever the reasons
Cannot choose—illnesses of many kinds
Perhaps inhibit the ability to freely choose—
Those will all be born along
And cared for as they bloom
Into full health and radiance.
For those who can, and I believe
You are one of them—you
Are blessed to be able to choose. Finally, there
Appears a thousand fireflies
Floating and bobbing,
Right there, in the daylight,
Illuminating light upon light,
And whatever you do
When the time comes to decide,
Remember this: there is field inside you,
Swaying beneath the breath of the one
Who loves you.
