Tag Archives: activism

A Call to Action For Allies of Transgender People, By Jennifer Angelina Petro

Posted on by

 

 

 

A Call to Action For Allies of Transgender People

By

Jennifer Angelina Petro

 

“We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented.”

― Elie Wiesel

 

 

Violence against transgender people and other queer people, especially queer people of color, is up ever since the terroristic Trump regime took office, and will only increase if the latest political assault on trans people goes through.

Trump wants to legally define gender based solely on body parts.  This would effectively erase transgender, intersex, and other nonbinary people out of existence.

Of course, we’ll still be here—we’ve always been here, and always will be.

What will happen though is that any and all legal protections will be removed (not that we’ve had many of them to begin with).  It will be “legal,” to deny transgender people healthcare, insurance, employment rights, and housing rights.

It will also give the haters even more license to commit hate crimes on people like me.  Why shouldn’t they if we don’t exist—if we don’t matter in the eyes of the federal government?  We shouldn’t they if we’re not going to be counted on the U.S. Census?

This amounts to genocide.  Yes, it’s a strong word.  Genocide means: “the deliberate killing of a large group of people.”  Its synonyms include: “mass murder, mass homicide.”

Will there actually be a mass killing of transgender people? I hope not, of course.  However, if one factors in an increase in the undocumented and documented murders of trans people, the documented and undocumented lives of young trans people lost to suicide as a result of constant—federally condoned violence and bullying, if one factors in the transgender people who will die as a result of lack of health care, or who will die on the streets due to homelessness, then the numbers of dead transgender people could become staggering (and yes—one is too many).  These atrocities will all worsen if the federal government decrees that we don’t exist.

What frightens me the most are the terrible consequences that young trans people will suffer. The kids.  The ones growing up into a future where they will have no federal government protections.  Their futures are in jeopardy even more than they are now.

It’s time allies.

It’s time to rise up and stand with transgender people and all other LGBTQIA people.

You might be thinking: There are a lot of other kinds of people to stand up for—lots of causes to fight for, and you’re right. Consider this though:

The next step after erasing trans people will be to erase people based on their sexual orientation, religion, race, political party, health issue, people on birth control, people who’ve had abortions, people who are differently abled, people who are different than the white and the rich, the educated and male.  What will it do to the #MeToo Movement?  A movement already scoffed at by many. Should sexual assault victims have human rights? Should children?

There was a time I would have thought these things would never, ever be possible.

They are though.  They are.  It has already begun.

Stand with me.  Stand with us.  This affects everyone.

What does it look like to stand with trans people?

 

-Write to your senators and local politicians.

-March with us.

-Educate your family and friends about us—risk being hated for what you believe.

-Add pro-trans FB profile frames on your profile pictures and/or your FB banners.

-Spread the word across all social media that trans rights are human rights.

-Stand for us in your places of worship and schools.

-Buy “Trans Rights Are Human Rights” shirts and wear them proudly.

-Hug us openly.

-Give to TransLifeLine, the Trevor Project, GLSEN, and other LGTBQIA services, like the ones offered at Love in Action UCC.   and The Center for Transgender Equality, The Human Rights Campaign.

-Adopt trans kids.

-Open your homes to homeless trans people.

-Go to the homeless and bring them food, water, blankets, medicine.

-Go to public restrooms with us.

-Invite LGBTQIA people to holiday dinners.

-And much more.

 

It is one thing to tell a trans person you love and accept and stand with them. It is another thing to take public action steps to demonstrate that love and acceptance.

And yeah, I get it.  Some of you are afraid of what others will say.  Some of you might be afraid for your safety if you openly fight for trans rights.  You might fear for your jobs, for your membership in places of worship, for what your friends and relatives might say. I get it.  On a daily basis, believe me, I get it.

Anyone who voted for Trump is complicit in the violence and deaths that will increase as a result of transgender people being erased in the eyes of the federal government.  So are those who remain silent in the face of such abuse of power. If you are too afraid to stand up to any of your friends and relatives who support Trump for my sake and/or the sake of an entire group of people, then where does that put you in relationship with those friends and relatives?  Where does it put you in relationship with me? With yourself?  With your faith?

If the nation only hears the voices of the haters, then that’s all Trump and his regime will hear–that’s all the haters will hear–it’s all the people who choose to do nothing will hear–and so the hate and violence towards people like me goes on. If the nation only sees the public actions of the haters and not the public actions of people in support of trans-rights, then that’s all Trump and his regime will see–that’s all the haters will see.  It’s all the people who choose to do nothing will see, and thus the hate and violence towards people like me goes on.

No.  This isn’t about guilt–at least not about unhealthy guilt–like the shame that erases oneself.  A certain kind of guilt can be healthy.  If you feel guilty about something you did or didn’t do and knew you shouldn’t have done that thing or should have done that thing–then feeling guilty can be healthy.  Shows you have a conscience.  So, no.  I am not trying to shame you–just help motivate you to rise up and show your support in public ways.

This is a plea.

This is a begging for something that should never have to be begged for.

I’m tired.

Tired of the fear I feel on a daily basis.  Will the place I’m going to be safe?  Will I be assaulted?  Will I be safe in a public restroom?  Will I live to see my grandchildren or be cut down because of who I am, and not what I choose to be?

I’m tired.  And I will keep fighting.

No.  This isn’t about guilt if you can’t fight, or need a break from fighting.

It’s a charge.  Fight if you can.  Not just on social media, but with your lives.

Stand with transgender people, intersex people, nonbinary people—all LGBTQIA people.

Stand with us openly, actively.

Lives are at stake.

Freedom is at stake.

The fate of the future for countless young people is at stake.

We need you.  I need you.

It’s time.

 

 

 

All donations from this post go to TransLifeLine.

 

On My Third Birthday of Coming Out as Transgender, September 18, 2018, By Jennifer Angelina Petro

Posted on by

On My Third Birthday of Coming Out as Transgender

By

Jennifer Angelina Petro

 

 

Last year I wrote about the fears I had of the upcoming winter.  Fall and winter are often the worst times of year for me mentally.  Two years ago, I went to the hospital twice in the span of two months for suicidality. Last year, with medicine, a wonderful therapist, Kellie Brunton of Ambler, PA, friends, a loving community at Love in Action UCC in Hatboro, PA, my poetry, and spiritual life, I had the best winter I have yet to have as far as mental stability is concerned.  I am so grateful.

This fall is more foreboding.  I know I need an adjustment in my meds.  I feel myself sliding backwards (deeper?) into my mental illness.  Fleeting thoughts of suicide and self-harm travel through my mind on a daily basis.  And while they are passive thoughts—they are there more than they’ve been in a long time.

I begin this annual update on my trans-journey because it is, for me, part and parcel of my experience.  By that I do not mean to suggest that I am mentally ill as a result of being trans.  No.  Being transgender IS NOT a mental illness, and while coming out three years ago blew up my life and that certainly didn’t help my mental illnesses, bring trans is a gift—-it is not, in any way, a mental illness.

My mental illnesses are part and parcel of my trans experience because they exist side-by-side, or, better put, are interwoven. So, to read this update on my Coming-Out-Birthday is to read also about my mental health, or lack thereof.

All that said, it’s been an exciting year with regards to trans-activism.  I’m fortunate to have been featured on an episode on the Internationally famous, Liz Plank’s, Divided States of Women. The episode also featured my faith community, Love in Action UCC (LIA).  I was also featured in a front-page article in the Philadelphia Inquirer that also celebrated the wonderful work being done by LIA.  Most importantly, LIA and myself helped Hatboro, PA, pass a human rights ordinance to help protect people of the LGBTQIA community.  It was an honor to be able to speak before the major (the incredibly badass, Nancy Guenst) and the City Council.  I have also led LGBTQIA support groups at LIA, local libraries, marched in marches, written to political figures, given workshops on what it is to be trans, and will be performing in October for the important revue of This is My Brave—a national organization for helping end the stigma of mental illness. I was also honored to be the first ever representative of the LGBTQIA community at Glenside Elementary School’s Diversity Festival.

These many opportunities for activism in both trans-causes and helping to end the stigma of mental illness, have been rewarding and hopeful.  And I need to be careful.

The more I do, the more I run the risk of careening into mania and then depression.  It is still an evolving process of learning to navigate feeling joy and being manic.  At least I am aware that this is a danger.  That said, I am missing more of the signs of mental health relapse, which is why I know I need an adjustment in meds.  In addition to transient thoughts of self-harm, mania has been slowly encroaching on my life and I am struggling with some of the symptoms of my mania—compulsive spending, eating, grandiose thoughts, plans, and ideas, racing thoughts, sleepless nights, the struggle to try and slow down both mentally and physically—the drive to plough through life is intense, as well as a myriad of other manifestations.  All of this impacts my trans-experience by making dysphoria worse, by making the anxiety to leave my apartment even to just go shopping worse—alongside, paradoxically, the increased amount of publicity I am both seeking and being sought after for trans activism.

I don’t know where it’s all leading.  I am still unemployed.  I came close to getting a couple teaching jobs, but they both fell through.  I continue to joyously volunteer at LIA helping direct an LGBTQIA Center at LIA, and that goes a long way towards helping keep my mental illness in check.

My finances, thanks to being bipolar and being unemployed, are worse than ever.  I have to appear in debtors court in a couple weeks.  I am close to filing for bankruptcy, and I have no savings of any kind.

I’ve had to move yet again, and although I am now living in the most adorable apartment, it was a huge stress to move for the third time in two years.  I am hopeful this new space will be long-term.  I love it here.

I continue to have the love and support of my ex, and the kids.  We went on a family vacation for the first time in probably six years this summer.  We went to the Redwoods and Sequoias, and was the funnest time, for me, our family has ever had together.

Poetry is still my beloved friend.  Music too.

I continue to do healing where my sexual abuse traumas are concerned, and while that work is gut-wrenching, it is, of course, crucial, and ultimately transforming and liberating.

My father passed away last spring and that brought many challenges with family and the coming to terms with his not speaking with me the last nine months of his life.  I sent him pictures of myself and after that, all communication ceased.  I wasn’t permitted to go to his funeral because I’m trans, which was incredibly painful.  My brother, however, arranged a private viewing for me, and for that I am deeply grateful.  In addition, when he wrote the obituary, he referred to me as Jennifer.  I wept when I saw that.  He calls me Jennifer all the time now, and that means the world to me.

All-in-all, it’s been a challenging, rewarding, and busy year, and I am so glad I’m alive.  Being transgender—being a woman—is an evolution of transformation, wonder, and gratitude.  My transition has shifted a bit in my gender expression—I am comfortable now with some days not shaving, and I am presenting a little more non-binary, which is fine with me.  My definition of what it means to be “feminine,” is broadening, and that too, is fine with me—and important as well.  I have given up on dating–and by that I mean the complete lack thereof.  I am gradually accepting that a long-term relationship is simply not in the cards for me. Lastly, with regards to my physical transitioning, I am grateful to have had an orchiectomy, and that has gone a long way in being comfortable my own body.  Full gender affirmation surgery is probably not going to happen due to finances, and I am gradually surrendering to that.

Thank you for your continued support, encouragement, love, and care.  I am so blessed with so many wonderful friends.  I humbly request your prayers for where my mental health is concerned, and I ask you to continue writing to politicians, schools, places of worship advocating for the rights of LGBTQIA people, to coming with us to marches and protests, to keep sharing with your families, friends, and communities that LGBTQIA people are as deserving of human rights as anyone else.

Peace, my friends, I love you all.

Jenn